Many men in divorce proceedings ask the lawyers representing them: can a man get custody? The answer is yes, but it depends on the circumstances.
When couples divorce, the working assumption is that in most cases the mother will receive custody of the children, especially young children up to the age of six, and that in other cases custody will be joint, divided equally between the father and the mother.
Even so, there are cases in which the court will decide to grant full custody to the father. These cases turn on a number of factors, such as parental capacity, the best interests of the child, the child’s own wishes, parental alienation, and more.
In this article we will look at whether a man can get custody and, if so, when and under what conditions.
Can a man get custody – terms worth knowing
Before we discuss whether a man can get custody, a few concepts need clarifying.
Guardianship: guardianship means legal responsibility for the child. In every divorce, and whatever the custody ruling, guardianship of the children always remains with both parents.
Custody: custody in a divorce refers to where the child will spend most of his time. The custodial parent is the one who raises the child day to day, while the other parent is given parenting time arrangements that set when, and for how long, he spends time with the child.
Sole custody means only one of the spouses, the father or the mother, has custody of the children.
Joint custody means custody divided equally between the parents: the children’s time is split evenly, some of it spent with the father and some with the mother.
Can a man get custody – it depends on parental capacity
When parents disagree over who will have custody of the children, the court can decide using a tool called a parental capacity assessment.
A parental capacity assessment examines each parent’s ability to raise the child: to provide a home, a stable and healthy way of life, along with an evaluation of each parent’s personality and financial ability to raise the children. Parental capacity is assessed by psychologists and social workers. If the court concludes that the mother lacks the parental capacity to raise the children, it will grant custody to the father.
Can a man get custody – it depends on the best interests of the child
The best interests of the child are the most important criterion before the court when deciding custody. The court will do everything it can to keep the children’s lives from being disrupted. It will weigh what the child’s life would look like growing up with the father against what it would look like growing up with the mother. The court will also ask the social worker accompanying the family through the divorce for a report on each parent’s ability to raise the children and on where the children’s interests lie.
If the court decides that it is in the child’s best interest to grow up with the father, the father will receive custody of the children.
Can a man get custody of the children – it depends on the child’s wishes
The court gives weight to the children’s own wishes when deciding custody. When the parents are locked in a dispute over custody and the court finds it hard to reach a clear decision, it will ask to hear the children’s opinions and wishes about where they will live after the divorce. The judge usually invites the child to his chambers and hears him out privately. In that conversation, the judge tries to gauge the child’s genuine wishes, taking into account his age and how well he understands what is at stake.
If the judge is persuaded that the child’s desire to live with the father is unequivocal, and that the child understands the meaning of the decision, he will grant custody to the father.
Can a man get custody – it depends on parental alienation
Parental alienation is a situation in which, during the divorce process and even after it, one parent systematically turns the children against the other parent, to the point where the children want no contact with that parent.
The courts treat relentless incitement by one parent against the other as a serious matter. In one ruling, the judge awarded the parents joint custody, but the mother kept inciting the children against the father, undermining the joint parenting and harming the children.
There are many explanations for parental alienation. One is that the mother, or for that matter the father, uses the children to wage war on the other parent. In recent years there has been growing recognition that parental alienation is a form of emotional and psychological abuse of the child.
When the court is persuaded that the mother is relentlessly targeting the father and using the children as a weapon against him, it may award custody to the father.
In many cases, even after ordering joint custody, the court may revisit the decision on the basis of changed circumstances and grant the father sole custody. The change might be an event that frees the father to spend more time with the child, an event that limits the mother’s ability to raise the children, or any other event with a significant effect on the children’s health, safety, education, or financial well-being.
So, can a man get custody? Yes, absolutely!
Despite the tender years presumption, under which custody goes to the mother in most cases, there are cases in which the father will receive custody of the children. When the court decides custody, it weighs the best interests of the child, the child’s wishes, parental capacity, the conduct of each parent, and more.
If you want custody of your children, come and consult with Adv. Avital Horef. Adv. Horef has deep experience in this field and has won sole custody for many fathers. You are invited to schedule a consultation at the office in Jerusalem or Tel Aviv.
